death and loss

Dear Young Spiritual Seeker,

You asked me in your last letter, “should I fear death?” I cannot ask that question for you, you have to find out the answer to that questions by living and dying.

I will not quote spiritual books to you or speak in terms of academic theology, I will speak from my own truth simple and plain. I do not know what lies after death. However, I do know that our life here is but a blink of an eye; human beings are but children to ancient trees or wise old turtle. Everything no matter how long it lives, will eventually die.

I am not a Buddhist, yet the wisdom of the Buddha’s words rings true, everything is impermanent. And yet, the impermanence of life does not render life meaningless, but each moment is precious and an opportunity to be present.

So my friend, we who live in a culture that denies death, we can be countercultural and embrace the truth of death and impermanence. Also, it does not mean our embracing the truth of impermanence will make our grief any less, when we say goodbye to someone we love due to death. Saying goodbye to a life is always hard, otherwise we would not be human, and yet it does not mean we have to wallow in sadness in pain.

My young friend, live now, so you have fully lived when it is your time to welcome death. For death is the great unknown, when we know not when it will knock at our door. Sit, breathe and inquire with curiosity your fear and find what lies underneath.

It is a joy to be your friend and companion on this journey of seeking and discovering. Be well.

Your fiend on the path.

Poem A Day: Day 10

fear grips me and pulls me into the depth of dark places
your love pulls me back from the deep of dark waters,
into the light and to the surface where I can breathe

your love reminds me to breathe deeply
and offer myself compassion that I freely give others

New Art Blog

Dear Friends,

I created another site for creating art in order to keep me sane and away from the hell of fear, depression, self-hate and apathy.

creatingmywayoutofhell.wordpress.com

Meditation Poem Series: #37

My parents came up from NC to watch my daughter in the morning, while I was at work. I left a little before lunch and we all went out to lunch together. I was able to meditate while my daughter napped.

Meditation Poem #37
fear slowly poisons the heart
trust in this very moment

Meditation Poem Series: #6

It was hard to get out of bed while it was still cold and dark, but I managed to sit and meditate on my cushion. I am feeling a bit anxious about the list of things I have to do today, and court appointed mediation tomorrow with my ex-wife. All that to say, it was super nice to simply sit and breathe.

Meditation Poem #6
I am pulled in all directions
sitting still, I breathe

(View from my window of the sunrise.)

A Letter about Anger

Dear Friend,

A wise man, Frank Oz, once said while holding a green puppet, “Fear leads to anger.  Anger leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side of the force.” There’s a whole array of wisdom sayings of Yoda, but I digress.

I am writing to you address your questions about anger.  You told me that you were asking me if you are unspiritual to feel anger, and somehow it was wrong?  My friend, you and I are both human beings, and anger is part of the human spectrum of emotions.  I love the words of Yoda, but I disagree.  Anger does not always lead to hate, it’s what we do with it that counts.  Buddhists talk about working with what’s coming up inside of you, and this too has been my experience.

Anger is often uncomfortable, and it can lead to a lot of actions that lead to suffering of self and others.  But there are instances where anger channeled into positive actions has lead to personal and social change.  The anger we feel when someone is treated unjustly is not bad.

Yoda/Frank Oz is correct in that often, fear often leads to anger, and anger can lead to hate.  Once we start hating, it is hard to come back from the darkness that surrounds in hating others.  We stop being open minded and willing to see a person as person, when we start hating on people.

It takes a lot of skill and experience to work with anger well.  In honesty, I really struggle with letting fear turn into hot anger.  Fear of not getting what I want, or someone taking away something or someone I love.  In those instances, I have found taking a pause or sitting with the anger instead of stewing in it helpful; the difference being that when I sit with anger I breathe deeply and pray for guidance on seeing the situation or person who made me angry in a different way.  I don’t always do this well, but there are times I was able to pause when agitated and reacted in a more gentle and wise way.  I have never experienced any true good from reacting out of anger, it always seems to cause me, and the other person deep pain.

Learning to accept difficult people in our lives with mercy and compassion is not an easy way of living.  So my friend, I suggest that you and I both try to make friends with our anger, and examine the underlying fear behind it.  I pray that the Divine Light within you will shine, and you let your life speak even when you are angry.

In the Light,

EunSung